Friday 19 June 2015

NEWSFLASH: GM Dinosaur Born with Superpowers. Has Hissyfit.

'The Park is Open.' 4words which in the realms of the land before time, mean GET READY FOR DINNNOOOOSSAAAUURRSSS! 
Jurassic World is upon us; the fourth part in a series which began in 1993, a year otherwise remembered as being mostly shit. Spielberg's Jurassic Park was a box-office sensation which frightened, excited and captured the imaginations of every parent and child from here to Timbuktu. I still get goosebumps from John Williams' breath-taking score, synonymous with that very first glimpse of what 65,000,000 years ago looked like as that massive Diplodocus ambled into shot...just before Laura Dern brought us back down to earth again when she began sifting through Triceratops poop. But, we're not here to reflect on what was. We're all about the what now? 

For anyone who saw the previous 2 instalments, they weren't brilliant. We had familiar faces trying to re-create the magic of the original - nods to King Kong bringing dinosaurs to mainland America, working within the boundaries of Hammond's derelict park and Sam Neill speaking to Raptors through one of their 3D printed nostril bones. It was all a tad wanky and disappointingly predictable. 

Jurassic World however, is not. It's 20yrs later and John Hammond's legacy continues upon Isla Nublar as the Masrani Corporation headed up by flamboyant thrill-seeker owner, Simon (Irrfan Khan), has built upon the remnants of what was before, and created the world's only Dinosaur theme park. However, with attendance numbers dropping and revenue beginning to slide, top-secret genetic splicing in the island's underground laboratories is underway to create the next big "attraction", alas we have the new bad guy in town, the Indominus Rex; a hybrid of the Tyrannosaurus and Velociraptor, with some other very fun bits of DNA chucked in for convenient measure. Elsewhere on the island, ex-NAVY turned Dinosaur Whisperer, Owen Grady, (the brilliant Chris Pratt) is developing ways to communicate with Raptors using a Biro with the sly Head of InGen Security, Vic Hoskins (Vincent D'Onofrio) on his case to weaponise the Clever Girls, which Pratt thinks is a terrible idea. 

On a weekend when her nephews are in town, the park's Operations Manager, Claire Dearing (Bryce Dallas Howard) has reluctantly agreed to play host to her younger nephews, Zach & Gray Mitchell (Nick Robinson/ Ty Simpkins) but due to corporate commitments coming out of her ears, gives them VIP tickets to the park in her absence. I know, best Aunt ever right? They expectantly wonder off on a mini-adventure in which we get to see some of the incredible forward steps made in CGI over the last 20years. The I-Rex escapes and all hell breaks loose, literally, in what is 124mins of the most fun I've had at the movies in AGES. The set pieces are out of this world. Director/ Writer Colin Trevorrow has managed to create the perfect evolutionary step for the Jurassic series in what I still
can't believe is only his 4th ever movie. Panning throughout the park's main attractions is a thing of beauty, as are the events that take place within its walls such as the Dimorphodon escape down 'Main Street USA', the Gyro-Sphere Safari, the Mosasaurus Aquatic Arena (amazing BTW) & the Triceratops donkey riding school. Ha. It's action adventure stuff of the highest calibre and the fighting sequences whether it be Dino vs Dino, Dino vs human, Dallas Howard vs Pratt's One Liners are some of Hollywood's finest and in my opinion, are the perfect showcase of just how superb the leading man would be as the new Indiana Jones. This needs to happen.

Claire and Owen's estranged relationship is fun to watch develop and although she goes through a physical transformation in the form of stand-offish workaholic to Lara Croft, it doesn't feel forced. Bryce Howard is a total babe too, I don't think anybody's ever so provocatively changed a shirt into a crop top. All the actors are excellent and huge kudos must go to the casting team for Jurassic World as the 2 brothers are terrific with some very funny moments together in the final act (holding hands jibe was classic) as well as Cage-Keeper Barry's (Omar Sy) affinity for dinosaur rights and the only cast member to return from the original, Dr. Henry Wu (B.D Wong) who's character is still a total and utter smarmy dickster. But, looks bloody remarkable for his age. 

Gripes. There aren't many. I was a bit anal about never finding out the exact genetic make-up of the Indominus Rex (which translates as 'Untameable King' - how cool is that?) eg. its extraordinarily long arms. Was it part Stretch Armstrong? Probably not, but we're never told. A lot of the action set pieces are somewhat rehashed version's of what was suggested in the original trilogy; communicating with Raptors (which has been done to death now), the giant aviary of Pteranodon's ready to play catch with anybody in the vicinity and the proposed possibility of genetic mutation. There was also no "Ah, ah, ahhh, you didn't say the magic word! Ah, ah, ahhhhhhh..." I'm perhaps clutching at straws a little. There was a great nod to the late Richard Attenborough in the museum main lobby with a statue depicting one of his most iconic characters.
 
Jurassic World is a total triumph. I was gripped from the moment the sinister opening credits began reminiscent of an old thriller flick. Lots of percussion, sharp strings to the birth of a cute, carnivorous little blighter who will have your finger off if you don't have your wits about you. Big dinosaurs, great scripting, spiffing casting and just the right sprinkling of nostalgia. 14yrs In The Making...and it was totally worth it. 

Jurassic World receives 5/5 Macho Man Randy Savage's mainly because there were no references to Ray Arnold's demise which means that a one-armed Samuel L. Jackson covered in cigarettes could STILL return for Jurassic Park 5. And that Chris Pratt becomes boys with a dinosaur called Blue. Which is amazing.